What If Coronavirus is a Dress Rehearsal for Something Way More Sinister?

Some thing’s been nagging me for a while. Kind of an itch really. And it’s been growing since before the Covid-19 nightmare. Like deja vue in reverse. That what we’re living through now is just a dress rehearsal for something much bigger. Maybe we’re experiencing the appetiser. You know, the precursor to a scintillating, jaw dropping main course – a goddamned Big Mac and fries!

What if Coronavirus is just the first step to something way more sinister? What if it’s like an early skirmish in a much deadlier war. And what if that war’s lurking just around the corner. What if Donald Trump was right and all the thousands of scientists were wrong about climate change but not in the way that we might expect. What if their predictions for climate catastrophe are actually too cautious.

What if we only have a few more years before we get hit by another global catastrophy – you know like another deadly virus or massive droughts, endless rainstorms, flooding, coastal collapse, or a combination of the above leading to huge population migrations, starvation and a devastating world war.

What if the world’s wildlife get so pissed off that they finally turn on us – lions and tigers roaming the streets of New York or London randomly attacking people. Snakes in our showers, tarantulas up our pj’s. What if aliens drop in to nuke us because they agree with the wildlife and have had it with watching us from afar while we fumble with the planet like a bunch of 3 year olds. Or what if, way, way scarier than any of the above, what if Donald Trump wins the next US election and we get another four years of his friggin twitter account.

ENOUGH!! ENOUGH OF THIS SHIT!! ENOUGH I SAY!!

What if we DO SOMETHING. What if we stand up and fight back. What if I didn’t have to write this domesday crap of a climate nightmare that’s starting to make me wanna find the next cliff and nose dive it like a kestrel. What if my rantings were about our progress defeating Corona and climate change and inequality and obesity and all things neo-con, er Liberal, er fascist.

What if we all just wake up one day and decide that we’d had enough. Enough of just waiting around watching storms get worse, public health get more viruses, forests get more fires, politicians get more useless and ExxonMobil make more money. What if we act now to survive our extinction – to roll back global warming. To save the planet.

What if we decided that Donnie and Bolsonightmarearo were wrong and Jacinda and Greta were right and that the way to attack the Corona consuming every inch of our daily, increasingly Netflix driven lives, was to kill it by waging war on the real problem – the climate thing. Getting all the public money flying around to go on green, healthy, climate friendly initiatives including walkable, bike loving cities, green spaces everywhere with rewilding verges, parks and commons.

What if all national treasures, reserves and crown lands were rewilded, what if every country started a major national tree planting campaign, what if the politicians and business leaders went all in and insisted on 100% renewable energy by 2035. What if us citizens stopped eating meat before dinner and shopped on foot to local stores and walked to work and to school and got on aeroplanes way less. What if we invested more in universal healthcare systems. What if our carbon emissions starting decreasing on an annual basis, what if pollution became an old desease we eradicated like malaria, what if national pride was restored by living in the greenest, healthiest and happiest place on the planet. You know, like Disneyland or the Playboy mansion or New Zealand.

And then again, what if we don’t. What if we do nothing and we have another five years of Corona 1.0 and Corona 2.0 and Donnie and Bozzer and heat and rain and fire and bedlem. What if we do nothing and the planet swallows us up and spits us out like a bug in a Big Mac. Or what if China and America decide that nuclear war is easier than tackling climate chaos and more fun than the endless twitter back and forth. What if Xi Ping Pong and Donnie end up being the last men standing – you know like a same sex Adam and Eve. What if these were like our least few years on this earth – like EVER.

You choose and God help you.

I’m emigrating to New Zealand.

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An Exit Strategy for the Climate Change Crisis

Seeing as no one in their right mind would wish for another government lockdown this is probably the right time to produce an exit strategy for the climate change crisis so that we can solve this more deadly event ahead of time and before the next, possibly permanent lockdown. Also, today is world Earth Day.

The good news is that if enough of us follow this simple 10 step exit strategy WE CAN reverse global warming while improving our lives, our health and wellbeing, our wildlife and this planet – but most importantly we, the human race, will also get to survive.

I have tried to keep this 10 step exit strategy as simple and achievable as possible. Each step is backed by science and each one has been selected to make the biggest difference possible to reducing global warming. None of these steps is hard for any of us to do. Over the coming weeks and months I will be writing more in depth about each of the 10 steps so that we can better understand why they are so critical and how, specifically, we can make them happen. I will also try to highlight some of the companies and government organisations that are leading the way on climate change solutions.

Myself, my family and my businesses have adopted each of the 10 steps and they work. We have also created a centre of excellence for the 10 steps just outside Exeter in the UK’s southwest. Visit us at Devon Sculpture Park when lockdown is over or join us today at DSP Online.

So here’s the ’10 Step Exit Strategy for Solving the Climate Change Crisis’:

1. Eliminate waste – eliminate all unnecessary waste with the ultimate goal being zero waste. It includes food waste, plastics and energy waste. This means shopping more diligently and frugally, eating everything you buy and getting better at freezing, composting wasted food, recycling metals, clothing and other materials and doing everything you can to remove household energy waste including heavier curtains over windows, all LED lighting and improved insulation.

2. Shift to a plant based diet – move to a plant based diet and at a minimum try to become a flexitarian eating meat just once or twice a week. Make your own kitchen garden so that you can eat your home produced fruit, vegetables and herbs. It’s more fun, convenient and reduces your travel emission footprint. Buy locally sourced food and pasture fed livestock.

3. Use renewable energy – switch to renewable energy sources including electric, solar, wind and possibly biomass boilers. In the short term maximise electric heating, water and cookers plus outdoor solar lights then start looking into solar panels or roof tiles and mini-wind turbines for your garden.

4. Shop differently – how we shop and what we shop for dictates how products and services are designed. By shopping differently we dictate whether manufacturers and service providers adapt their offerings to become more environmentally friendly. So insist on eco-friendly products and services whether it’s eco-friendly clothes, shoes, food (whether in shops or restaurants), contractors and repair services. There are already plenty of them. For example insist on a gardening service that uses rewilding gardening techniques and electric gardening tools.

5. Rewilding your garden – rewild your garden, terrace, courtyard, verges and more. Lobby your school, neighbours, churchyard, office green spaces, commons and local parks to rewild their green spaces. Learn about wildlife gardening techniques.

6. Change your approach to travel and transport – try and travel less after lockdown. Do you really need to shop for food more than once a week in the car. Try to walk or cycle to the local shops, to work or school. Home work as much as you can while insisting on virtual meetings wherever possible. When you change your car buy an electric vehicle or an electric hybrid at a minimum. Try to reduce flying for leisure to just one flight a year and holiday locally and whenever possible at eco-resorts.

7. Elect environmentally responsible politicians – choose politicians and leaders in general that make solving the climate crisis their number one priority. There is no longer any excuse for any government, business or farm not having a clear, deliverable net zero carbon plan to be achieved by 2030. Hitting zero carbon by 2040 could be too late.

8. Be more frugal and balanced in your life – consume less, exercise more, spend time in nature, read more, spend more quality time with family, friends and in your local community. Make things that are eco-friendly whether it’s DIY, hobbies, projects, community initiatives or the arts.

9. Work for environmentally friendly companies – you get to choose who you work for so choose companies that have clear, short term net zero carbon plans and let you work from home unless you’re in walking or cycling distance of the office. Push them to provide more environmentally friendly products and services, workplaces, warehousing and logistics. Get them to rewild any of their green spaces.

10. Stay healthy and adapt your lifestyle – with Coronavirus lockdown we have a unique opportunity to change the way we live and work. We are already forced to do many of the things required to reduce global warming and to solve the climate crisis. We have seen a massive reduction in global emissions. So just keep doing much of what you’re doing but in a more sustainable way. And if you go beyond this and become a more rounded pro-environment citizen you will not only do your bit to save the planet but you will also develop skills and experiences that could qualify you for the next massive global industry – the climate solution industry.